Let's talk about Embracing Simplicity during the holidays (or anytime). Here is a Grace-Filled Guide to Letting Go This Holiday Season
The holidays are often painted as a time of joy, togetherness, and celebration, but they can also bring pressure—pressure to uphold traditions, meet expectations, and create picture-perfect moments, along with dynamics that can be challenging. This season let’s give ourselves permission to let go of the things that cause unnecessary stress. It's okay to say no, to simplify, to use paper plates, and even to buy a pre-cooked meal if that means you can enjoy the moment. Let's embrace grace for ourselves and for others, letting this season be a time of true connection, not perfection.
Recognizing Your Limits and Setting Healthy Boundaries
Acknowledge that it’s perfectly okay to say no to extra activities or events that drain you.
Remember that traditions can evolve—focus on the ones that genuinely bring you joy.
Setting boundaries doesn’t make you less caring; it ensures you’re able to show up fully in the moments that matter most.
Understand what is too much for you to handle and allow time to rest.
Delegate and don't try to be the holiday superhero!
Permission to Simplify - I know this is a big one for many of us! I give you permission to simplify!
It’s Okay to Use Paper Plates: Hosting doesn’t mean a fancy setup. Paper plates and disposable utensils can save time and stress, leaving you more energy to enjoy the event.
Buying vs. Making: There’s no shame in ordering or buying dishes instead of making everything from scratch. The real focus is on being together, not on the hours spent cooking. Tip: Fresh Market's Little Big Deal is a game changer! You still cook it, but it is so easy and inexpensive vs buying all the groceries!
Focus on activities that uplift rather than overwhelm—grace is about simplifying with intention.
Ask for help. Ask others to bring side dishes, desserts, drinks, etc. to help ease the load.
Finding Joy in What Matters
Rediscover the small moments: lighting a candle, playing music, enjoying a quiet morning before the festivities begin.
If you have the energy and excitement for a big holiday production, go for it! But if not, know that a smaller, simpler celebration can be just as beautiful.
Try new things like a walk together, driving to see holiday sites, or tell stories.
Tips for Making Conversations Comfortable
Shared Gratitude: Invite each person to share one small thing they’re grateful for from the past year. This activity is a light way to set a warm tone.
Memory Sharing: Go around and share favorite holiday memories or funny family stories. This keeps things upbeat and centered around connection.
One Word Intentions: Ask each person to share one word that captures their hopes for the coming year—this can foster meaningful but lighthearted conversations.
Do a puzzle: One year my niece brought a puzzle and it was such a great activity!
Practice listening: Take time to truly listen to others and take a pause on trying to decide what you will say next.
Redirect: It is fine to say you aren't enjoying a conversation or are uncomfortable. Try saying things like, "This can be a contentious topic, let's talk about something else so that we can just enjoy the day", or "I don't know a lot about that, how about a different topic?", "That reminds me of_____" and gently change the topic.
This holiday season, let’s choose grace over expectations and connection over perfection. By letting go of traditions or ideas that no longer serve us, we create space for a season that’s filled with authentic joy and meaningful memories. Give yourself permission to simplify, to say no, to let go of guilt, and to celebrate in a way that feels right for you. The best gift you can give is your presence, fully rested and joyful, ready to embrace whatever the season brings. Let's embrace simplicity and let go.
Next week is Thanksgiving! I am at least 4 generations in on the same menu every year. My mother calls it THE Menu! I invite you to our table.
THE Menu:
Butter beans
Technically speaking these are baby lima beans and as a Southern girl I want you to know that you cook them forever, squish some against the pot in their liquid, and include fat back. The key to yummy butter beans is the pot liquor
1 bag of frozen baby lima beans (or more if you have a crowd).
fill pot to an inch or two over the beans
Add a Tbsp of butter.
Optional: Add in a piece of fatback, ham, or bacon.
bring to a boil then reduce to a medium simmer and slowly cook forever! Ok, at least an hour, or until the beans are tender. It is best if you can cook them all morning or 3-4 hours, adding liquid if needed.
Use a fork and smash some of the beans against the side occasionally, this helps make the liquid (pot liquor) creamier.
Salt & Pepper. Not your basic boring seasoning, in this case it really matters. Salt it well and personally I like a lot of pepper too.
Serve. We serve with the option of bowls and a ladle or a slotted spoon so that people may choose to have it with pot liquor or not. I'm team pot liquor!
Macaroni and cheese
In the south this is contentious! There is Macaroni and cheese with egg and without, with chunks of cheese or smooth sauce, stove top, baked, and crockpot! And nobody makes it like momma does! Everyone's momma! Well, almost! Don't ask for the recipe if some lady's Macaroni has leftovers at the end of a covered dish!!
A few good choices:
Emeril's 4 Cheese Mac and Cheese - Ok Y'all! I make this one and one time Van and I were standing in line at Target when the cashier said "Are you Brian's dad - Family resemblance. and then she turned to me and said "I heard about the macroni and cheese!!". Tales have been told and it was good!
Cooks with Soul - Your "eggy" option, custardy. This is a great recipe and evaporated milk really helps the creaminess. Southern food and "black folk" food (the author calls it) have much in common and you will see this type of dish on many country folk's tables.
Candied Yams - I know a lot of y'all add things like marshmallow and nuts, but I like a good ole basic candied yam. I want the yam pieces, and I want some of the little tails pieces to be brown and crispy! Got it?
1 large can of yams, drained
1/2 cup brown sugar
1 Tbsp cornstarch
1 cup orange juice
1/2 cup butter, softened
Combine sugar, cornstarch, and orange juice to small saucepan. bring to a boil and reduce to a simmer. Stir constantly until thickened and sticks to the spoon.
Add butter and stir until melted
Place yams in a casserole dish and pour the glaze over the top
Bake at 350 for 30 minutes.
Ham:
Place a roasting rack in the bottom of the pan and place your ham on the rack fat side up. Score the ham in diamonds across the top and put whole cloves in each diamond. With toothpicks place pineapple rings across the top of the ham. Using the juice from the can of pineapple, dissolve 1/2 cup of brown sugar into it. Glaze the ham with 1/2 of the mixture. Bake at 325 for 3-4 hours or until done (depend on the size of your ham). When the ham is almost done, pour the remaining glaze over the ham
Mamame's Potato Salad
Ingredients:
6-8 potatoes, peeled and cubed
3 eggs
1-2 stalks celery, diced
1/2 small onion, diced
Pinch of sugar
Salt and pepper, to taste
2 tbsp sweet pickle relish
Mayonnaise, to taste
2 tbsp yellow mustard (or to desired color)
Instructions:
Cook the Potatoes and Eggs:
Place the cubed potatoes in a large pot of water. Add the eggs to the same pot. Bring to a boil and cook until the potatoes are tender, about 10-15 minutes.
Tip: Making the potato salad while the potatoes are still warm enhances flavor and texture!
Prep the Ingredients:
Once the potatoes are tender, drain the potatoes and eggs. Transfer the hot potatoes to a large mixing bowl.
Peel and chop the hard-boiled eggs, then add them to the bowl with the potatoes.
Assemble the Salad:
Add the diced celery and onion to the bowl.
Sprinkle with a pinch of sugar, salt, and pepper to taste.
Stir in the sweet pickle relish and mix well.
Add Mayo and Mustard:
Add enough mayonnaise to reach your desired consistency. For a classic medium-yellow color and slight tang, stir in about 2 tablespoons of mustard, adjusting to taste.
Serve:
Mix everything until well combined. Sprinkle with paprika. Serve warm or chilled, as desired. OK honest? - I like a little warm and then I chill it to serve it.
Deviled Eggs
After hard boiling the eggs cut in half and remove the yolks into a large bowl. To the yolks add, salt and pepper to taste (be careful, the salt is easily over done in this), add 2-3 tablespoons sweet pickle relish to 6-8 eggs and about 1 Tablespoon of yellow mustard. Add enough mayonnaise to make it creamy - this is a preference thing. Mix will and fill the mixture into the hollow egg whites. Top with paprika.
Rolls or Biscuits
When I was about 20 I told my grandmother, Mamame, that I couldn't make biscuits and with complete sincerity she looked at me and said "However will you find a man"! And that friends is how important biscuits are.
I didn't master them until sometime in the past 10 years, but my husband loves me. One day I made this recipe from Tupolo Honey and a choir of angels sang when they came out of the oven. My son didn't believe they were good, took one bite then a big breathe and just said "Daaaaannnggg! I wanted to give you a hard time, but these are so good!". So here you go!
Tips: Grate the butter, it makes all the difference. The batter looks too wet, but it works.
Share your traditional holiday meals in the comments and be sure to tag me on social media if you try one of my family's dishes.
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